Herself: I really admire farmers who don’t use chemicals.
Me (surprised): Do you?
Her: Yes, it must be so hard to grow things in a vacuum.
Me: Good one.
Her: Yes, and it helps tell the wheat from the chaff.
Me: Which am I?
Her: Well, I’m not a farmer so I’m not sure which is the good one, but the good one.
Archives for October 2016
Busy Times
Last week was a bit horrendous. I had parents’ council on Tuesday night, open night for what may be the boys’ school on Wednesday and a play on Thursday. The play was about how Irish society treats Travellers (appallingly) and I left the theatre staggering under the weight of my guilt for being complicit in really dreadful prejudice and treatment. It was worthy but it wasn’t exactly a fun night out. On Friday night I went to Cork leaving Mr. Waffle to manage collecting Herself from French class, minding the boys (including getting the hairdresser in to give them a haircut) and letting in Falling Fruit who were volunteering to collect the apples from our three trees and give them to good causes. He managed. Partly because Herself was sick and couldn’t go to French class. But it was all a bit much. Still, I am delighted that our apple harvest is being used rather than rotting on the grass.
The Tooth Fairy Hovers on the Edge of Bankruptcy
Essential Tragedy
Regular readers will recall that the Princess and I made mint essence over the summer. When we took it out from its cool dark place after a month of resting, we strained out the mint and tasted it. It looked a revolting brown colour. It smelt absolutely vile and, I regret to tell you that it tasted revolting. That’s €20 worth of vodka literally down the drain. Next time, we’ll just buy peppermint essence. Sigh.
I’m More of a Big Picture Person
Daniel and his hurling team took part in a competition and there was a photo of them in the club newsletter and a write up of the match. A colleague of mine is in the same club and I showed him the article. “Oh yes,” he said, “that’s a great competition and they won it.” “Oh no, I think they came second,” I said. He was surprised but said no more and admired the photo. I came home and told Daniel, “I showed the article to my colleague who’s a very good hurler and he was very impressed even if you guys didn’t win.” An outraged Daniel replied, “But we did win!” I should probably have read the article.
Allergic
The boys’ school has banned nuts as there are nut allergy sufferers in the school. This includes popcorn which we find a little baffling as it is maize. However, our favoured brand is apparently made in a factory where they also package nuts so we have negotiated approval for a brand change. In advance of the shopping with the new brand arriving, I said to Michael that he would have to manage without popcorn for a couple of days. “Oh no,” he said, “I can have my old popcorn for now. The new nut policy is like Brexit: it’s decided but not implemented.” Insert your own Brexit/nut related jokes here.