belgianwaffle

Archives for 4 June, 2005

LRB personals


Posted in: Reading etc.

For the literary types:
Salinger, 33, seeks Sagan.
For the weird:
There’s enough lithium in my medicine cabinet to power three electric cars across a sizeable desert. I’m more than aware that this isn’t actually a selling point, but nonetheless it’s my favourite statistic about me.  Man, 33 – officially Three Cars Craazy.
Box no.07/10

I mean, really, is he honestly hoping for a bulging postbag?
Yeah, ok, I’d prefer him to Salinger seeking Sagan as well, but I’m not sure that he’s selling his best points..

Meanwhile the organisers of the bottle of champagne prize for best personal ad are out of control, see this:
“Box no. 07/08 sent a complimentary letter with her ad, so she gets the champagne this issue and also sets a precedent for others to follow. Ads are 80 pence per word, but manners and pathetic grovelling cost you nothing.”

Things not to say to a pregnant woman


Posted in: Boys, Reading etc.

“Gosh, you seem to get bigger every half hour”
“Do you know you pant when you climb up to the third floor?”
“How can you bend over to pick up your little girl?”
“Were you this enormous last time?”
“If the babies are 375 grams and 410 grams now, that means they have to increase 10 times in weight before they’re born”
As the pregnant one takes off her coat “Oh my goodness, you’re pregnant”. As she turns to hang it up “Very pregnant! What are you:8 months?”

And while we’re on the subject of tactlessness and pregnancy, you may not have had the opportunity to read about Venetia Quick who is a presenter on some Dublin radio show.

Herself and her partner were in the Irish Times weekend magazine (itself a publication inspiring both pity and horror) last Saturday. Here’s what the article says:

“Eight months pregnant with her first child, Q102 presenter and producer Venetia Quick is never out of her killer heels and refuses to spend money on maternity wear. “My only concession to pregnancy has been a pair of size 12 low cut jeans and some stretchy combats,” she says. “I’ve covered the bump with belts, cardigans, scarves.  I’ve been as creative as I can.”

Yes, Venetia, making friends and influencing people, eh� No, I am not just jealous.

Comments
Minkleberry

on 05 June 2005 at 17:55

belts? Is she a leprechaun??

gingerandorange

on 06 June 2005 at 01:32

everyone else is just jealous and ‘Venetia’ is clearly in denial

poggle

on 06 June 2005 at 10:54

I feel sorry for the woman – imagine being called Venetia Quick. Dear me.
And I bet she’s bought American size 12s. Innit.

Kate_Sith

on 06 June 2005 at 17:39

I worked with a girl last year who was pregnant with twins and still wearing size 12 trousers from top shop ‘with the top button undone’. I think I was at school last time I fitted into a Topshop trouser.

belgianwaffle

on 08 June 2005 at 20:30

OOOH, you are all so nice. Well, assuming the best in your case JD. And TWO sweeties G&O, too kind. Pog, I would love to agree with you but there was a photo in the bloody magazine and she does look nauseatingly svelte. Kate, distressing. Minks, I liked your comment the best, could you are the bees knees.

dmts

on 08 June 2005 at 20:34

Good lord – I can’t cover up a big lunch with a belt – I think I may be in trouble.

belgianwaffle

on 09 June 2005 at 21:20

No, not at all. It’s when you can’t cover yourself with a double decker bus that trouble looms.

Beth

(Homepage)

on 10 June 2005 at 18:56

Hey, can I come rub your belly? I like that even better than the boneheaded comments.

belgianwaffle

on 11 June 2005 at 15:09

Yeah, that is annoying…it’s still my stomach, in there somewhere.

Sarcastic Journalist

(Homepage)

on 15 June 2005 at 04:39

I also love “Wow. You’re huge!” or another personal favorite
“You planned this so why are you freaking out?”

belgianwaffle

on 15 June 2005 at 22:04

Hello, sarcastic journalist. I like your blog. I also like the simplicity of “Wow. Your’re huge”. Obviously, that’s not the kind of thing you’d notice by yourself.

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